Let’s talk about porn. That’s right. I love porn. I’m a woman, and I am admitting that it’s one of my favorite ways to release pressure: stress. I used to pretend that I only watched pornography to make fun of it. The “acting” is, of course, humorous. But there’s only so much funny that I can watch before the laughter dries up and excitement roughly takes its spot. This is the stimulus for which I imagine most people turn on the boob tube. I like that I don’t have to do much imagining all things considered.

As most of you I’m sure already know, whether or not you are willing to aurally come clean about it, pornography finishes in two positions: soft-core and hard-core.

Soft-core porn generally hangs abreast of the performers, sticking to images on top of the unmentionables. In other words, the camera remains chest-level and above mostly, hardly ever going down. In hard-core, anything goes. The longer the…penetration scenes, the harder the porn. Anal people make more headway with hard-core than soft. I hope I gave you a firm grasp of the spreading distinction.

I find hard to be more pleasing than soft, but to each his/her own. I don’t know your personal reason for watching pornography (or reading it, I guess) – that is, if you find yourself slipping into porn for encouragement – but for me, it’s a quick taste of satisfaction.

In short, it definitely gets the juices flowing, if you know what I mean.

One time, when I was somewhere around sixteen or seventeen, I went to a friend’s party. About halfway through the night, one of my other friends points to the television and sort of laughs in disbelief. I walk into the family room and notice that there are people gathering around the TV. I look at the screen, and all I see is…I’ll let you create your own images. It was pretty much the first one I’d ever seen, and my friend whose house it was kept rewinding it and restarting it because the beginning was her favorite part. I remember wanting to sit down and watch. No lie.

However, there were about thirty people at the party, and at the time I was afraid to expose my true feelings about it. So instead of touching upon my interest in the adult movie, I laughed with everyone else and said it was ridiculous. I tried to get my friend to turn it off. I didn’t try very hard.

Since then, I have always orally expressed myself. I constantly insert myself into conversations about porn, bringing it up as often as possible. Last year, I watched porn in a group again, and even though the movie did not climax in the same way as when I’m alone, I still had a swell time.

My favorite was one time when I turned on porn at home. My mom was upstairs. I sat below the balcony, the sound turned low, one hand on the remote, the other hand on…

I could feel my heart beating faster and faster; I knew I could get caught any second. Adrenaline raced through me, fear straddling me like the man on the screen. The movie finished without incident, but it was tight. I was definitely almost laid bare for the world to see my self-indulgence.

Basically, I want to openly share my interest in porn because I think it is looked down upon far too much in this society.

To my knowledge, I am the first one to put my appreciation of pornography on paper at Brandeis. Who will come with me?