First and foremost I want to say that this riveting piece of American brain-rot perfectly describes the Mom I’d Like to F*ck (MILF) dating scene. It really is relatable escapist content! Imagine being swept away into a villa in La Paz, Mexico, with your son, to pursue romantic relationships with someone decades younger than you. While some of the MILFs were getting out of a divorce, their future lover was just being born! This creates an element of awkwardness that completely cuts the horny romantic tension and just pure natural chemistry that all the contestants most certainly have!
The show also acts as a complex case study of the American right’s dating life. I, a muse, sing to you a scenario… *cue flashback music* Your Hinge date labeled themselves a Moderate, as the date progresses you learned they were simply masquerading as a Moderate. Even worse they tell you that they are a Ron DeSantis stan, and then you “Nope” right on out of there. That is the experience of TLC’s “MILF Manor.” American ignorance is placed on full display. “Disco-Mommy,” one of the premiere MILFs on the show, displays her xenophobia in full force when two of her Hispanic MILF competitors are speaking their native tongue in front of her. The insecure Disco-Mommy believes they are talking about her, and demands they cease speaking Spanish, because something along the lines of, “We’re in America… and we speak English here-”… oh wait, they’re in La Paz, Mexico… she’s just an average American bigot.
Well, okay, those are the MILFs, let’s see about our generation, we are the future, they are the past! There is still hope for our generation’s dating life and future!
Young Male Contestant: “I want to suck the acrylic off their toes”—followed by the most foul down-bad staring contest with the camera.
We’re doomed, absolutely doomed.
Bullshit aside, something interesting to note is that this reality show has no actual host. This struck me as odd, but then I realized, who the f*ck would want to host this show? It would tank their career! The “host” is a text message the contestants all receive on their show-supplied phones. The “host” challenges the contestants to reveal dark secrets about their pasts, and to demonstrate their favorite sexual positions with fruit. The most saucy and daring typically win the competitions. Always a fun activity with your MILF mother. The reward for winning is to ask either one of the MILFs or one of their sons on a date.
There is no actual way to get eliminated from the show, unlike in cult classic “Total Drama Island,” except if you literally have creeped everyone out on the show. Which is a low bar, but it was met. But do not worry! The producers have a backup MILF and son combo to replace the ousted duo. However, the pair know they are at a severe disadvantage as everyone else has had the time to “form a connection” and to “bond.” They may be connecting, but not emotionally ;).
The show was absolutely horrible at best and traumatizing for the contestants at worst. One of the MILFs, So-Young, revealed to her son that she slept with her son’s best friend back at home. This destroyed the young man. He proceeded to get hammered, naked and just mindlessly swam in the pool while his mother tried to fish him out. Honestly, that is the sole piece of relatable content from this show.
“MILF Manor” is not something that I can recommend you watch by yourself. Brain-rot is best accompanied by its natural complement, great friends who love shit-talking horrible and creepy people. I can recommend having one or two binge-watching nights with friends, food and drink. That is the only way to enjoy this content.
