To acquire wisdom, one must observe

What is the best sandwich?

It is a truth that should be universally acknowledged that a sandwich is only as good as its ratio. What ratio, you ask? The ratio of bread to filling. You see there is a very distinct ratio that must be kept between bread and its filling and it’s not 1:1. It’s got to be at least 5:2. I actually don’t do math but if you know you know and if you don’t well sorry. Anyways, here’s this week’s ranking. It is of 37 sandwiches I found on a list online and one more that I randomly thought of. 


  1. Smørrebrød

When I read this I originally thought it was a s’more, but with two pieces of bread instead of graham crackers. I then looked it up and realized I was not close at all. I haven’t tried this before but it didn’t look that appealing to me. 


  1. Muffuletta sandwich

I also have never tried this before. I looked it up and realized that it had olives. I do not like olives, so 37 it goes. 


  1. Bun Kabab

So then … It’s not a kabab. It’s in a bun, not kabab. Kabab no bun, this have bun, NOT KABAB.


  1. Jambon Beurre

This is the last sandwich I have never tried on this list. However, I have to admit that this one does not look bad. I just can’t rank it higher because I haven’t eaten it before. It’s pretty simple. You just put ham and butter on a baguette. How can that not be at least okay?


  1. Smoked Salmon Sandwich

I actually like smoked salmon. Just not on a sandwich. End of story. 


  1. Spaghetti Sandwich



  1. Ham Sandwich

This list is going to get really confusing because it appears as if there are a lot of repeats. It seems like there are a lot of sandwiches that you could consider to be a ham sandwich. Also there are a lot of grilled cheese sandwiches that we will get to. 


  1. Aloo Sandwich

Haloo to you. 


  1. Meatloaf Sandwich 

Just eat meatloaf and eat a sandwich. Two positives make a negative. I don’t make the rules. 


  1. Egg Salad Sandwich

I think my only issue with it is a lack of consistency. I have had many good ones and really terrible ones. 


  1. Mozzarella In Carrozza

I am going to be honest. This is just like a different grilled cheese. 


  1. Bacon Egg & Avocado Breakfast Bagel

This is a very hit or miss sandwich for me. As many people already know, I do not like breakfast. However, sometimes breakfast sandwiches hit different. 


  1. Tuna Melt

When I was growing up I did not eat a lot of tuna. Recently, I actually had my first tuna melt and I have to say it’s a bit underwhelming. I think tuna is good, but I just may not be a fan of fish on a sandwich. 


  1. Fried Bologna Sandwich



  1. Shrimp Po Boy Sandwich

This is another case of seafood on a sandwich. Shrimp is good, but on a sandwich it’s meh. You might think, “Why is this 24 then?” And I will respond with I have no idea. 


  1. Pastrami Sandwich

What do you get when you put our managing editor in between two pieces of bread? A pastraMi(a Plante ’23) sandwich. I admit that was not my finest work. 


  1. Reuben Sandwich

I forgot what a Reuben sandwich was for a second, so I had to look it up. I can’t believe I am saying this, but it has too much meat. 


  1. Kentucky Hot Brown

This is an interesting sandwich. Bacon and turkey together is a solid combination. In general though, the sandwich can get a bit overwhelming. 


  1. Italian Sub

In Italy they just call it a sub. 


  1. Chicken Salad Sandwich

I had never had a chicken salad sandwich until I ordered it from Louis Deli here on campus. If I had the sandwich before, it wasn’t super memorable. It’s fine. 


  1. Bacon Lettuce and Tomato (BLT) Sandwich

I have never had a bad BLT. The combination just works well. 


  1. Caprese Sandwich

I don’t really like these very much. I only put it this high because Morrongiello said she would rip my arms off if I put it low. (Morrongiello did not say this)


  1. Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Ah, the classic. There’s nothing really special or wrong about grilled cheese. I only put it this low because I got a grilled cheese sandwich one time in the dining hall and the cheese was completely solid and not melted. It was a sad grilled cheese. 


  1. Croque Monsieur

It’s an upgraded version of the ham and cheese sandwich. 


  1. Monte Cristo

It’s an even more upgraded version of the ham and cheese sandwich. 


  1. Club Sandwich

When you eat them at the club, they are just sandwiches. 


  1. Lobster Roll

I know I said I don’t like seafood on a sandwich. However, lobster is just great so I am breaking my rule. 


  1. Falafel Sandwich

Similar to the lobster roll, I think falafels are great. You put them in a sandwich and they are still good. 


  1. French Dip Sandwich

I don’t know why dipping a sandwich is so cool.


  1. Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich

The classic elementary school sandwich. It’s still a great option regardless of the time of day. 


  1. Homemade Sloppy Joe

We do not condone cannibalism on this paper. 


  1. Greek Chicken Gyros

In Greece they are just called chicken gyros. Okay, I promise that is the last time I will make that joke. 


  1. Cuban Sandwich

I promised that I wouldn’t make the same joke. When you eat these at a baseball stadium and it is still very good, you know it’s a solid sandwich. 


  1. Ice Cream Sandwich

You might be surprised to see this up here. The reason why ice cream sandwiches are in the top five is because they are one of the best desserts out there. 


  1. Hamburger

It feels strange to rank hamburgers this high. When I am thinking about hamburgers though, I am thinking about them with unlimited toppings. In that case it’s a top five sandwich. 


  1. Philly Cheese Steak

We get it, you’re from Philly. Why don’t we go to the Rocky Steps while we’re at it. 


  1. Chicken Parmesan Sandwich

Just an exquisite sandwich. 


  1. Báhn Mi

Some of you may not know what this is. Báhn Mi is a Vietnamese sandwich with a baguette, chicken and pickled vegetables. It does not sound like much, but if you have never tried it before you should. 


-1. Hot Dog

Hot dogs are a sandwich. There is bread and something on it. I don’t know why I put it here. I don’t even like hot dogs.

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