I randomly saw a tier list of vegetables on social media and was incredibly disappointed. It was so bad that I decided that I had to write the one true ranking of vegetables. I would like to point out, some of these vegetables I rarely eat so there may be some biases there. Anyways, here’s a ranking of 50 vegetables that I randomly found online.
- Chard
I am going to be honest I don’t remember the last time I had chard. It’s kinda just there.
- Kale
Kale I have actually had regularly. This is not a good thing. The dining hall serves it semi-frequently and I can say that kale is not good. It’s bitter and not fun to eat. Whether it’s cooked or uncooked it’s bad. Some people may say it has health benefits, but it’s hard to ignore how bad it tastes.
- Rutabaga
This is another one where I cannot really remember what it tastes like. If I did it would probably be good.
- Rhubarb
Rhubarb pie is good. However, as a vegetable alone who knows.
- Yams
They are there at Thanksgiving but let’s be real, they are just the worse version of sweet potatoes.
- Parsnips
This list is kind of going off the rails already. I don’t think I have ever had parsnips before yet I am ranking it ahead of food I have had before. Well we move on.
- Broccolini
Broccolini isn’t actually that bad. It’s just a fancier version of broccoli. However, as you will eventually see, broccoli is way better. Because of that, I have to rank broccolini lower. If you were looking for a vegetable ranking that actually made sense, you are looking in the wrong place.
- Beets
Beets are weird vegetables. For some reason I see beet related things everywhere, yet I don’t see a lot of people actually eat beets. The only thing I really know about beets is that Dwight Schrute owned a beet farm.
- Green gourds
I am looking at my list of vegetables and I realize that I probably should have put this higher considering I have no idea what a green gourd is.
- Artichoke
Artichokes are not actually that bad. I just don’t eat them often and they aren’t better than anything else on this list.
- Pumpkin
This one may be a bit controversial but I am talking about the vegetable here, not the spice that goes in the latte. Pumpkins get a lot of fame in the fall especially but in reality it’s not really because it tastes good.
- Collard
I am not sure if I really understand collard very well even now.
- Radish
Radish is another one I am pretty indifferent about. They are decent some days but otherwise they are just whatever.
- Okra
Okra is an interesting vegetable. I had never really eaten much okra before coming to Brandeis and I have to admit it’s not that bad. I find that they soak up the sauces around well so if the sauce is good then you got some good okra. However, that doesn’t happen often, so okra is most of the time just meh.
- Leeks
I don’t really have a lot to say about leeks. They have a lighter onion flavor which is good in some situations.
- Arugula
I don’t think I have ever had arugula besides in a salad, which may be a good thing. In a salad, it exists. It provides a different flavor profile compared to the lettuce that you may normally focus on in the salad.
- Butternut squash
We have reached the point where the vegetables here I don’t dislike at all. I find most of these next vegetables good in some situations. Butternut squash is a great example. I am not sure if I would eat it alone, but in a soup or macaroni and cheese it’s fairly good.
- Water chestnuts
For the longest time I did not like water chestnuts. The taste always lingered and never really fit when in a dish. However, I have grown to like them. They add a different texture and a crunch to whatever dish you put them in.
- Lima Beans
Lima beans do taste good. I really believe that. However, sometimes the texture of lima beans can be a bit off. When you bite into them they just don’t feel right sometimes.
- Watercress
I don’t really eat watercress a lot. I honestly may have never had watercress outside of soup before. However, I do really like watercress in soup which is why it reached this point on the list.
- Squash
I think Brandeis serves squash a lot in the dining hall and I have to admit, it’s always okay. I am not saying it’s ever incredible, however squash is pretty consistent. I know what I am getting when I eat squash.
- Zucchini
I think zucchini and squash are interchangeable here. They both are just okay. Grilled zucchini sometimes is on another level, which is why I give it the slight edge here, but neither one of these vegetables really blows me away.
- Green beans
Green beans are in a similar boat to squash and zucchini. They are very consistent and very easy to cook. They aren’t anything special. I don’t really have any reason to put it over squash or zucchini but I did anyway.
- Jalapeños
This one may be a bit controversial. If you are a spice person you are probably putting this a lot higher. However, I am not a spice person. I do think that jalapeños have great flavor and they go well with a lot of things. Jalapeño poppers are great. Stuffed jalapeños are great.
- Snow peas
Snow peas are just fun. Most of the time when I have snow peas, they are almost an afterthought. However, they always hold their flavor well with the dish. You have snow peas in a sauce and they are great.
- Shallots
We have reached the top 25 and I am going to start it with shallots. I always think of shallots as fancier onions. They have that onion flavor but just slightly different. This flavor is good and I only put it lower than some of these other ones because I don’t eat them often.
- Lettuce
Lettuce is like a guinea pig. It’s always there and it’s fun but they aren’t nearly as fun as a cabbage or dog. Lettuce has its value in a salad and a burger but beyond that it isn’t the most flavorful thing on the planet.
- Green cabbage
Green cabbage is sort of like lettuce. It’s there in a lot of dishes and always tastes fine. It can provide a different texture to a dish.
- Sweet potato
I think over the past couple years sweet potatoes have grown on me a bit. Although I would rather have regular potatoes rather than the sweet ones, I still think sweet potatoes have their place. Sweet potato fries are great and even just a baked sweet potato tastes great. They only place lower because I don’t think I could eat these on a regular basis.
- Turnips
So I really like turnip cake or 蘿蔔糕/萝卜糕. My Chinese is not great, but I do love the dish. However, I don’t think I really have eaten turnips by themselves. So, it’s high because of a single dish, but low because I don’t know how turnips are used otherwise.
- Avocado
This is 100% going to be controversial. I don’t think avocado is bad, I just find it overrated. It’s good with chips and in burritos/tacos however I really don’t see why people will pay so much for it. Avocado on toast is the biggest mystery for me because people will pay $20 for bread and avocados.
- Green onions
Green onions are very hard to rank. You might put them in everything and they taste good, but do they really do a lot for a dish? Most of the time they are there as a garnish that adds a little bit to the dish. But realistically speaking, are you eating green onions by themselves?
- Chinese cabbage
I am not entirely sure if Chinese cabbage is the same thing as Napa cabbage, but I am just going to assume so for now. This version of cabbage has much more flavor than normal green cabbage. It goes in a lot of different dishes such as spring rolls and dumplings. But the main reason why it’s so high is because it’s used in kimchi which is great.
- Corn
Corn has a ton of uses. You can put corn in pretty much anything. It ranges from a salad to dumplings. You could also eat them straight off the cob after grilling. They are great.
- Celery
I don’t think I would say I like cooked celery that much. In some dishes it definitely provides a little value, but the taste isn’t super powerful. However, as a snack and uncooked it’s great. You can dip it in ranch, hummus, peanut butter and more depending on what you like.
- Eggplant
Eggplant sometimes has a weird texture. Also eggplant when cooked poorly is just super out of place. To me, it has one of the biggest ranges as a vegetable. When it’s cooked poorly it’s horrible, but when it’s cooked well it’s great.
- Carrots
I don’t have much to say about carrots. Someone recently told me that bunnies don’t eat carrots though which is interesting.
- Daikon
This is another vegetable that I can’t really explain very well. It tastes great, but especially in soup.
- Brussels sprouts
Brussels sprouts are similar to eggplants. I have had a lot of bad brussels sprouts in my life, but when you cook them well they are great. Just a little bit of garlic when you are cooking them and bam.
- Bell peppers
Bell peppers are just universally great. They are good uncooked and cooked. You can put them in tons of dishes. This may be getting a bit repetitive but it’s difficult to describe 50 vegetables.
- Asparagus
I think I have always liked asparagus for some reason. The only issue is that it makes your pee smell weird. So yeah.
- Tomatoes
I know what you are going to say. Tomatoes are a fruit not a vegetable! Yes, they are but have you seen this list? It makes no sense already. Tomatoes have a pretty strong flavor that a bunch of people do not like. Yet, they like ketchup or tomato sauce. It’s confusing. Just like this list.
- Bok choy
Bok choy is great.
- Spinach
Spinach–good source of iron. Popeye also likes it.
- Garlic
I hate to put garlic here because I think a lot of bad dishes can taste good if you just put some garlic in it. Garlic flavored things are great and it elevates so many other foods. The only reason why I had to put it lower was because it is kind of difficult to just eat garlic by itself.
- Onions
I put onions in the same boat as garlic. They taste great and when you put them in a dish, the dish instantly tastes better. The issue is again that it’s difficult to eat by itself. You can sautee them and it’s great, but other times they are hard to eat alone.
- Broccoli
Ah good ol’e broccoli. I find that people either hate it or love it. This guy loves it. End.
- Potatoes
Mashed potatoes, french fries, potato salad, potato chips, loaded baked potato soup, hash browns, tater tots, smiley fries, potato latkes, gnocchi, potato bread, diced potatoes, potato skins, baked potatoes, potato puffs and scalloped potatoes end of story.
- Cauliflower
I love cauliflower a lot. Creamed cauliflower is amazing. Cauliflower steak is amazing. I am sure people are going to argue with me on this one, but there isn’t one. They are 100% one of the best.
- Mushrooms
That’s right I said the best vegetable is something that isn’t even a vegetable. There are so many types of mushrooms and they are all still great. I really thought I would have more to say about mushrooms but I don’t. Just trust me mushrooms are the best.
So that’s my ranking of vegetables and not vegetables. Don’t eat breakfast or kale.
