Humanites v sciences with a whipped topping of perversion

The average student at a liberal arts school such as ours generally has two choices regarding which path to take through four years of quality education offered by top-notch staff and state-of-the-art duck and squirrel population all for the measly sum of $120,000 plus room, board, meal plan, student activities fee, technology fee, gratuity fee, gratuitous fee, duck and squirrel maintenance fee, presidential salary fee, and the fee to round off the number of fees to 10 so theyll fit in the Excel spreadsheet used to print and calculate the final fee.

Something old, something newundergrad theater preview

This article is dedicated to those who think there is nothing to do at Brandeis because this semesters undergraduate theater scene offers so much varietyfrom light, amusing comedies to politically-charged dramas and from Renaissance classics to the freshest offerings of Broadway. This really is a season that offers something for every theatrical taste.

Qimmeq and the cafeteria caper

Fall semester: Seems like only yesterday. Fear. Dysentery. Midterms. And none of us will ever forget the events of 12/11, the day that changed Brandeis forever

Thus began a quest by some brave students, with the help of my faithful dog, Qimmeq, to solve the Mystery of the Cafeteria Caper.

Hope the hype will help: a music preview

In the 1996 film The Great White Hype, the faux boxing world in the Hollywood tale was thrown into a whirlwind of popular public interest in the sport due to one promoters ideal to pit the world-boxing champion against an unknown, white boxer. Among a number of the themes the film built upon, it is the pure exploitation of the unknown boxers race that builds up the hype needed to promote interest in a sport thats losing its accessibility to the public. It is the films smart observation of the ever-present presence of hype in sports, and life, that makes the rather weighty comedy redeemable;

the ability for hype to create, popularize, and even kill entire careers, movies, and (in the case of the movie) boxers is an incredibly important aspect of modern society. It is the aspect of hype that plays such a strong role in the world of music;

it creates some bands' entire careers while diminishing other groups careers into nothing. At the very core of it, hype is something that keeps the modern publics interest afloat;

with that in mind, here are a number of bands that hopefully will be in the good graces of hype in the coming year.

The Brandeis Brief

Zionist Organization of America threatens boycott
The Zionist Organization of America has threatened to boycott the University due to its employment of Khalil Shikaki, a scholar at Brandeis Crown Center for Middle East Studies, according to New York newspaper The Forward. The ZOA accuses Shikaki of ties to Islamic Jihad. These alleged ties were the subject of a Tuesday article in The New York Sun. University President Jehuda Reinharz said there is absolutely no evidence of any offenses, according to The Forward.

Nashim funding threatened

A group headed by Albert Cahn 07 and Robbie Schwartz 08 appeared in front of the Student Union Senate Dec. 11 to prevent the Hillel member group Nashim from receiving Student Activity Fee (SAF) funding for its annual talent show.

Terrorist threat on Heller

The Office of Public Safety received an anonymous e-mail Wednesday claiming that there was an imminent threat to the Heller School for Social Policy and Management, resulting in an evacuation of several University buildings and a nearby elementary school.

Swim notebook

This past week brought mixed results for the Brandeis swim teams. On Jan 14, the Men and Womens Swimming teams traveled to MIT to take on MIT and Colby College. MIT and Colby both dominated Brandeis. Four days later, Both Brandeis teams rebounded from their previous loss to defeat Clark University.

Jumbo-sized effort from Malcolm paces Judges

Three days ago, Brandeis suffered its first loss of the season to conference rival NYU. Tuesday was Brandeis chance to rebound from that heartbreaker by taking on regional arch-rival Tufts.

WBasketball notebook

Brandeis winning streak came to a halt at ten games, as they fell to division rival New York University 70-68 on Saturday. The Judges were 4 wins shy of tying last years 14 game unbeaten streak.

This week in sports

Baseball
A lawsuit is currently underway over who owns baseball statistics. Major League Baseball says that they own all of the statistics. A company that runs leagues for fantasy sports is arguing that once a game ends, those statistics become historical facts that can be used to power fantasy games.

NFC final preview

NFC Championship: Seattle versus Carolina
The Seattle Seahawks are probably the least respected number one seed within the last couple of years. Several experts have stated several times even as the Seahawks picked up win after win that they were not a reliable team to root for in the playoffs, they were too soft and will likely fall apart.

AFC final preview

Last weekend, the top two American Football Conference teams predicted to go this years Super Bowl XL were defeated when the Indianapolis Colts fell to the bottom-seed Pittsburgh Steelers and Tom Bradys ten-game perfect playoff record was shattered by the Denver Broncos.

Track Notebook

The Brandeis Mens and Womens Track and Field teams traveled to Bowdoin University on Jan 14 for a mid-winter meet, and when all was settled both groups of Judges were on the short end of the scoring.