Senior year of high school my friend introduced me and a few others to something that has captured my thoughts every spring since. Each spring I get a craving for citrus unlike any other craving. This craving makes me feel as though the simple act of eating an orange can cure all of my worries: my seasonal depression, my pre-finals anxiety, my biweekly fear-of-death panic attacks… all of it cured by a common fruit. What my friend told us years ago was that eating an orange in the shower has been known to make people happier—which has given me a sense of hope for every orange I eat that maybe this one will make me feel better. 

But what I think is missing is the fact that I have not yet eaten an orange in the shower! I have avoided it just because it felt kind of silly; standing there naked and damp peeling an orange? It wasn’t really something I felt would do me good, but rather it would make me feel awkward and sticky? But nearly 70 thousand people who are a part of the reddit group r/ShowerOrange, say it is an enlightening experience. One user posted that the shower orange technique made them feel “like a monkey in a warm summer rain.” Another says that to get the best experience you must “plung[e] your mouth into the glistening orange flesh while water [runs] over your head and body like a warm rain under a hunter’s moon” and “revel in the savage beauty of nourishing one’s body.” If you know me, you know I am terrifyingly put together most times, and the idea of letting that go for one moment to devour an orange completely nude is thrilling and honestly what college is for.

Since I am so hungry for joy and finals are coming up, I felt as though I should put this to the test. My hope for oranges helping my mood was missing this key ingredient, and thus I am going to devote this upcoming week to eating oranges in the shower every morning (yes I am a morning showerer, don’t be rude I’m going through enough). While the thought of eating food in the EAST BATHROOM is terrifying and nauseating, I am going to do this for you. All 0 people who are actually reading my articles. So I guess, take this article as the “before.” Before the Shower Orange, I am exhausted constantly despite sleeping all the time. I rarely do all my homework, and feel guilty for it, but am skating by in classes nonetheless. Arguably, I am okay but am I good? No. Will the Shower Orange give me more serotonin than my antidepressants? We will see! 

I am hoping that I will have seen God in an orange by this time next week, but who knows?! Maybe this experiment will make me feel as ridiculous as I thought it was a few years ago, but oranges are good, showers are good, how bad could it be? 

Editor’s Note: This is the first article in the series, Shower orange.